Caucasians Explode Back Into Wiffle Series with 10-0 Romp in Game 3

6 Aug

Morrison and the Caucasians celebrate at home after one of their six homers in Game 3

Down two games and heading on the road, the Caucasian Vaginas had their backs against the wall heading into Game 3. Rather than fold, they erupted offensively, pounding the Fish Sticks 10-0 and pulling within a game of tying the series heading into Game 4.

The Caucasians had tried inverting their batting order in Game 2 to spark some offense, but the strategy failed. The potent Caucasians offense had scored only one run in Games 1 and 2 combined, while their Pitch King Guthrie had been shaken in Game 1. When they shuffled the lineup in Game 3, no one batted an eye, but Guthrie’s call to start Higgins ahead of himself on the mound shocked the Fish Sticks and the whole wiffleball world.

The Sticks sent Dinger to the mound fresh off his dominating shutout in Game 1. However, it didn’t take long for him to give up his first run of the Wiffle Series, as the Caucasians came out swinging in Game 3. Guthrie led off the game with a single, and the next batter, Morrison, put the Caucasians ahead right out of the gate. He crushed a two-run blast to deep leftcenter field, and the Caucasians were off and running. Dinger settled down to retire Higgins and Les and end the top of the first, but it wouldn’t be long before the Caucasians were back at it.

Morrison belts one of his three bombs en route to a record-setting offensive day

Down 2-0, the Sticks came to the plate in the bottom of the first. Higgins retired Blose, who flew out to the mound, for the first out of the inning. Dinger followed with a one-out single, his first hit of the Wiffle Series, but he was stranded at first when Higgins got Joey to ground out to Morrison in left for the second out of the inning.

The Caucasians repeated the first inning in the top of the second, as Guthrie led off with a single. With a man on first, Morrison came to the plate and hit another bomb, his second two-run homer of the game, putting the Caucasians up 4-0. Higgins followed by flying out to right field for the first out of the inning, but the Caucasian rally would continue. Les singled with one out, and Guthrie followed with his second single of the inning to put runners on first and second. The next batter, Morrison, hit a rope down the left field line. He would race to second for a double, and both Les and Guthrie would score to put the Caucasians up 6-0 through one and a half innings. Morrison had 6 RBI in his first three at-bats, setting a playoff record (that he would later break). Higgins grounded out to center for the second out of the inning, stranding Morrison at second, but the Caucasians had opened up a six run lead early.

Vassallo grounded out to lead off the bottom of the second, and Blose followed with a one-out single. But Higgins stranded the runner at second, retiring Dinger for the second out of the inning.

Up 6-0, the Caucasians stepped on the Fish Sticks throats in the top of the third. Guthrie led off the inning with a solo homer, pushing the lead to 7-0. Morrison followed with a solo homer, his third home run of the game, a playoff record, and his seventh RBI of the game, also a playoff record. With the score 8-0, Higgins came to the plate and slammed yet another solo homer, making back-to-back-to-back home runs, giving the Caucasians a 9-0 lead, and chasing the Sticks’ starter Dinger from the game. The Sticks had been shaken, and down nine runs they called Vassallo from the bullpen to make his first career appearance on the mound. He started off great, striking out Les for the second out of the inning, ending the disastrous third for the Sticks, but the damage was done.

Guthrie was relentless at the plate in Game 3, hitting two home runs and scoring five runs

The Sticks were unable to figure out Higgins, and starting in the bottom of the third he got on a roll that would last the duration of the game. He retired Joey and Vassallo in order for a perfect third inning, and the Caucasians led by nine runs through three innings.

Vassallo got a taste of the Caucasian fever in the top of the fourth, as Guthrie led off with a solo homer, his second home run and fifth hit of the game, putting the Caucasians up 10-0. He was able to shake it off, however, and retired Morrison and Higgins to end the inning.

Unable to stop the bleeding, the Sticks turned to Vassallo who made his first career pitching appearance

Higgins continued to roll in the bottom of the fourth, as Blose and Dinger were both retired by Morrison in left to preserve the shutout.

The Caucasians had their first scoreless inning of the game in the top of the fifth, as Vassallo retired Les and Guthrie in order, the first perfect inning by a Fish Sticks pitcher since Game 2.

Joey and Vassallo were sent down consecutively in the bottom of the fifth, as the Sticks were unable to put up a fight.

Higgins was a force on the mound in Game 3, giving up only 3 hits in a complete game shutout of the Sticks

Morrison flew out to Vassallo at the mound for the first out of the top of the sixth, but Higgins followed with a one-out double. The Caucasians couldn’t add to their already insurmountable lead, however, as Vassallo retired Les to end the sixth, stranding Higgins at second and sending the game to the final frame.

Down ten runs, the Fish Sticks couldn’t mound a rally at any point in the game, concluding in the bottom of the sixth. Blose doubled to lead off the inning, but Higgins stranded him at second base, retiring Dinger and Joey consecutively to end the game. After falling behind 2-0 at home, the Caucasians had stormed back on the road, sending a message that this series was far from over. The Sticks still lead 2-1 heading into Game 4, as the Caucasians will look to even the series on the road.

Game Notes:
– Higgins pitched a complete game shutout victory for the Caucasians, scattering only three hits with no runner advancing past second base
– Dinger took the loss for the Fish Sticks, giving up 9 ER on 10 hits in 2.5 innings pitched
– Vassallo gave up 1 ER on 2 hits in 3.5 innings of relief for the Sticks
– Morrison broke multiple single-game playoff records, going 4-6 with 3 HR, a 2B, 3 runs scored and 7 RBI
– Guthrie also had a record setting day at the plate, going 5-6 with 2 HR, 3 singles, 5 runs scored, and 2 RBI
– The Caucasians broke multiple single-game team playoff records in Game 3
– The visiting teams are now 3-0 in the Wiffle Series. The Caucasians were 8-2 at home during the regular season, and 2-0 at home in Round 1. The Fish Sticks were 8-2 at home during the regular season, and 2-1 at home in Round 1.

Box Score

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