Tag Archives: Blose

Inaugural All-EWL Team Named, Caucasians and Fish Sticks Selected

19 Jul

The 2011 All-EWL Team

Blose and Joey of the Fish Sticks along with Morrison and Guthrie of the Caucasian Vaginas have been named to the first ever All-EWL Team, recognizing the top all-around players throughout the 2011 regular season. The four players received a significant portion of the votes, enough to separate the four from all other finalists.

Blose was dominant offensively and defensively throughout the 2011 season

It’s no surprise to see that Blose has been named to the All-EWL Team. He was an unstoppable force at the plate throughout the majority of the regular season, and carried his team defensively as well. He set single-season league records in nearly every offensive category, led the league in put-outs, and was the only player in the league to record a save (3 of them). He was the only two-time Pabst Blue Ribbon Wiffler of the Week, taking home the award for weeks 3 and 10. He won the batting title by 11 points, finishing the year at .490, one hit away from a .500 season. He slugged over 200 points better than any other player, due in large part to hitting 20 home runs, 4 more than any other player. He led the league in RBI with 30, and won the EWL Triple Crown, a feat that was not anticipated and may not occur again soon. He came through in the clutch, and at times was the only player on his team producing. He was an EWL star from week 1, and the 2011 season will be remembered for his statistical achievements and great plays.

Guthrie was clutch at the plate and unhittable on the mound

Guthrie, the 2011 EWL Pitch King, can add another badge to his 2011 season, as he is now a member of the All-EWL Team. Guthrie made his name on the mound, shutting down opposing teams as the Caucasians rode his arm to the pennant and #1 seed. But he was no slouch at the plate either. He finished in the top 10 in almost every major offensive category, but finished in the top 5 in only one category, GWRBI. That stat, however, best describes his offensive performance in 2011. When the Caucasians needed a big hit, Guthrie was there to deliver, often putting them over-the-top for the win. He hit safely in all but two games that he played in, and had three multi-HR games, including a game with 5 RBI. He missed six games this year, and had he have been able to play a full 20-game schedule, his offensive numbers surely would have been more impressive and competitive. When he was in the lineup, he was a tough out at the plate, a rock solid fielder, and the best pitcher the game has seen. His presence was crucial to the Caucasians success in 2011.

Morrison was an elite player and a model of consistency in 2011

No EWL player was more consistently productive throughout the course of the regular season than Morrison of the Caucasian Vaginas. Morrison hit safely in all but two of the nineteen games he played, and had 2 or more hits in 16 of the 19 games, a remarkable total. He had at least one home run every week of the entire season and didn’t strike out a single time, totaling by far the most at-bats of any player who didn’t strike out. Morrison was in the top 3 in every offensive category except doubles and triples, and was ranked 2nd or higher in an incredible 10 different categories. His 7 GWRBI were two more than any other player in the league, showing how regularly his performance at the plate led his team to victory. He finished 24 points higher in batting average than everyone in the league except Blose, he was one of three players to slug over 1.000, one of two players to hit over 15 home runs, and would have won the triple crown if not for Blose. He totaled 91 putouts, and was the foundation of the Caucasian defense. Morrison took the league by storm and turned the Caucasian Vaginas into the championship favorites.

Joey was the Robin to Blose's Batman for the Fish Sticks

Joey’s 2011 season was bookended by stretches of terrific offensive performances, with a dry spell in the middle, and solid pitching throughout. He started off the season on a tear, only to return to Earth midseason, and heat back up in time to help lead the Sticks to the #2 seed as the regular season schedule concluded. Joey carried a 14-game hitting streak into the final third of the season, and hit safely in 18 of 20 games. He finished in the top 5 of every single offensive category, over 12 different stats, and led the league in doubles. He finished 3rd to Blose and Morrison in five different categories including hits, runs, HR, RBI, and total bases. He was one of 5 players to hit over .400, and hit 20 points better than the next best player. He was the only player to hit double digit singles, doubles, and home runs, and his 4 GWRBI were third most in the league. He set a league record with wins on the mound, totaling 8, and finished with the league’s 5th lowest ERA. He was solid in the field, netting only 43 putouts but rarely committing an error.

The full vote tally will be posted tomorrow, as the same vote was used to determine Wiffler of the Year. Stay tuned.

Three Teams Represented as 2011 EWL Field Masters are Named

16 Jul

The 2011 EWL Field Masters

Luke of Pumice on Slow!, Blose and Vassallo of the Fish Sticks, and Morrison of the Caucasians Vaginas have been named the 2011 EWL Field Masters, an award that recognizes the best defensive players throughout the EWL regular season. These four players played top-notch defense consistently throughout the season, racked up the top four put-out totals, and made the biggest impact for their team in the field.

Luke of Pumice on Slow! was the top vote-getter among Field Masters

Luke was the top vote-getter, finishing 2nd place in league voting by a single vote, and moving to first in overall voting after the commissioner vote. Luke tied for the most first-place votes, and his combination of 7 first and second place votes was the most in the league. Luke finished fourth among fielders in put-outs with 70, averaging 4.3 put-outs per game. He was typically deployed in leftfield for Pumice!, and has the single game league record of 12 put-outs in one game. He routinely made catches out of the tree, scarfed up ground balls, and made difficult fly ball catches in fair and foul territory. He played the ball off the fence incredibly well, and could get to balls quickly enough to retire even the fastest base runners. He was the bright spot on an often shaky Pumice! defense.

Blose of the Fish Sticks led the EWL in put-outs and spectacular plays

Blose led league voting by one vote, and 2nd in overall voting after the commission vote. He tied Luke for most first-place votes and also tied for most overall league votes. Blose led the league in put-outs, setting a single-season record with 96, averaging 4.8 put-outs per game. He often played centerfield for the Fish Sticks, where he captained the Sticks defensive unit. He alone made 3 or 4 of the top 5 defensive plays of the year throughout the league. He showed great range, running to catch fly balls in left, center, right, or the infield, and backed up his teammates, occasionally catching balls they attempted to catch or had missed. He snatched balls off the fence for outs, made one-handed snags of line drives, and was a constant reassurance for the Fish Sticks pitching staff.

Morrison of the Caucasian Vaginas helped lead his team to the fewest RA and lowest ERA

Morrison finished 3rd in league voting and also 3rd after the commissioner vote. Morrison had the most 2nd and 5th place votes, and tied Blose for most overall league votes. Morrison finished second in put-outs with 91, and tied Blose for second in the league by averaging 4.8 put-outs per game. He and Blose went neck-and-neck for the league lead in put-outs throughout the season. Morrison played leftfield for the Caucasians, and was the anchor of the Caucasian defense. He directed where the fielders would be positioned, and regularly called off his teammates on fly balls, sure that he would make the snag. He made difficult catches look easy, and could read the flight of the ball better than any other player in the EWL. If errors and fielding % were stats in the EWL, he would have led the league, as he rarely misplayed or mishandled a ball. He helped lead the Caucasians to the lowest runs-allowed and team ERA thanks to his consistency in the field.

Vassallo of the Fish Sticks had the highest put-outs per game average in the EWL

Vassallo finished 4th in league voting and also 4th after the commissioner vote. He finished with the most third place votes, and second among first-place vote-getters. Vassallo finished third in put-outs with 80, leading the league with an average of 5.0 put-outs per game. He started every game he played in leftfield for the Fish Sticks, and likely would have led the league in put-outs if not for missing several games. He read the ball off the fence, whether in the air or on the ground, better than any player in the league, and he caught balls out of the tree with ease. His range extended far into foul territory, as he tracked and ran down fly balls that most players in the league couldn’t get to. No balls got beyond him, and on the few balls he had trouble with, he kept them in front of him, limiting extra-base hits. He was smart and conservative with the ball, often running it in to the pitcher, preventing the opponent from taking bases.

The league and commissioner voting coincided to select four Field Masters that clearly had more votes than any of the other candidates. Les of the Caucasian Vaginas and Marr of 4 out of 5 Dentists (who received the 5th place commissioner vote) were in a second tier of candidates that separated themselves from the pack in terms of voting. Six candidates finished with 11 votes or less. 4 out of 5 Dentists was the only team not represented by the Field Masters, despite having 4 players finish in the top 12 in voting.

Blose Named Week 10 PBR Wiffler of the Week

14 Jul

After a dominant week in which he carried his team to two victories, Blose has been named Pabst Blue Ribbon Wiffler of the Week for Week 10, becoming the first player in EWL history to be awarded the honor twice.

Blose was unstoppable at the plate, going 8 for 13, hitting .615 over two must-win games for his team. He hit 5 HR, including 4 in the last game of the season alone, and the walk-off game-winning home run in the bottom of the ninth inning of the final game of the season, clinching the #2 seed for the Fish Sticks. He scored 6 runs, had 5 RBI, and 2 doubles. He registered 13 put-outs for the week, and all but locked up the Wiffler of the Year trophy with an outright legendary week 10.

Blose hit 5 HR in week 10 en route to capturing the Triple Crown for the 2011 season

Blose Named Week 3 PBR Wiffler of the Week

25 May

For the first time in league history, the voting was unanimous as Blose was named Pabst Blue Ribbon Wiffler of the Week for Week 3.

Blose had the single greatest week in EWL history in week 3, totaling number previously unseen. Over the course of the two games he went 10 for 15, hitting .667, crushing 7 home runs, including four in consecutive at-bats, drove in 11 RBI, made 14 put outs, and, by the way, hit for the cycle.

Blose dominated week 3 and is the PBR Wiffler of the Week